Weight of the World

Today, I fell apart. Today, I broke down on the grass outside. Today, I wiped away the tears and kept going. Today, I realized just how busy I am. I haven't slept in four days. Not because of food or my body or anything like that. But simply because I have so much to do. There's like no need to sleep. I volunteer, intern, am on USY board, do theatre, and have school work. On top of being a teenager with an eating disorder. Today, my facade broke. And that's okay. I carry the weight of the world on my shoulders. Sometimes, I just cannot handle it anymore. Which is when it is okay to cry and when it can be okay to say no. Yes, I know a commitment is a commitment and letting go of those is hard. But sometimes you can't do everything. As I fell apart, and listed everything I have to do, someone offered to take something over for me. I felt so guilty about it. I still do. And I told them that. So, they said fine you aren't turning t down, I am taking it and that is that. I couldn't argue. I had most of what needed to be done, already done. But they could see me breaking from stress and refused to let me be so overwhelmed that I couldn't help myself. While talking through it...I realized and was told that sometimes you need to write out a list and prioritize or that the weight of the world isn't on me and I can sleep. So, below I will post my to-do list from now till Sunday plus my overall priorities. Hopefully y'all can keep me accountable. Feel free to comment with your to-do lists!

Overall Priorities

• Recovery
• USY/ Friends
• Theatre/School
• Interning
• Volunteer work
• Job Search

Thursday:

1. Eat
2. Plan May USY Event
3. Practice Theatre Song
4. Finish Decorating for Harry Potter Shabbat

Friday

1.  Eat
2. Go To Tutoring
3. Help With Harry Potter Shabbat
4. Have A Sleepover With My Friend

Saturday

1. Eat
2. Go To Theatre
3. Go Shopping With My Friend
4. Do Homework

Sunday

1. Eat
2. Help With Shorashim/Bonim Event
3. Help Set-Up USY Event
4. Go To USY Event

To-Do Lists Can BE A Life Saver. How do you use them?

Stay Strong 

xo Aria